Bench Press Hero - Dude.

"Dude, how much you up to on your bench?"
"Probably around like, 300 Dude." (Around "300" is code for 250)
"Dude!"
"Yea, I know."
"300 dude?"
"300 dude."
"How often you benchin' dude?"
"3 times a week bro, I mean dude."
"Duuuddde"

The preceding was an actual conversation that I made up to illustrate how bench-press heroes think and operate. What exactly is a bench-press hero? Let me elaborate, dude.

There are two categories of bench-press hero or BPH. The first is the hardcore BPH. He lifts 3 times a week, and can be found exclusively on the bench-press. Typically he is benching more than he should be, without a spotter, which results in him being pinned under the bar a lot and squealing for help, followed by statements like "I thought it had it dude, I repped that like 10 times yesterday!" The hardcore BPH also does all sorts of weird bench variations that have absolutely no scientific foundation, because he usually made them up himself. He enjoys asking everyone else what they bench - dude, and offers unsolicited advise on how to improve your bench-press performance... Thanks, but no thanks dude.

The second category of BPH only lifts once or twice a month. He is also unfamiliar with any other machine besides the bench-press. His routine consists of doing a set and then standing up and checking himself out in the mirror for 5 minutes, then repeat. This sort of BPH is convinced that his rigorous, bi-monthly program is secretly making him huge. He can definitely see a difference after each set. And he wonders why the hardcore BPH is spending 3 days a week for the same imaginary results.